Going insane

I seriously can't take this crap anymore. I think there's some kind of weird conspiracy between CJ and the dog to make me insane. I know that sounds crazy, but I swear that's what's going down. I can't sleep in our bedroom because the dog is driving me nuts. We do everything possible to keep him from scratching the hell out of himself but it's not working. Every 5 minutes, all night long, he gets up and scratches himself until he's whining because it hurts. Oh and of course he's also kicking the plastic cone he has on which makes a lot of noise. The GF can sleep through it, but I can't! And I'm not allowed to put him out of the bedroom. Heaven forbid he might whine at the door for a few minutes. She can't take that. So I have no choice but leave the bedroom. Only problem with that is, where am I supposed to go?! CJ is in the living room sleeping every single night even though she made a huge deal about needing to have the bigger bedroom back because she was ONLY sleeping in the living room because she couldn't stand being in the small room. So where am I supposed to sleep? The bathtub? The treadmill in the dining room? The kitchen floor? The car?

I don't freaking know anymore. I think this is all some half-conscious attempt by CJ to break me and the GF up. Or maybe she's just really that selfish and doesn't care about how anyone else feels. All I know is I need to get some freaking sleep before I go completely nuts.